Wednesday, September 26, 2007

RE Consult--CHECK

So, Andrew was able to make it to meet with the RE yesterday and I think it was a big help to both of us and also to help us figure out what we are comfortable doing to get pg. I think we have a plan laid out for at least this cycle and the 2 following. After that, I'll need to think a little more about the path. There is a chance I have some endometriosis and this could be the cause of our problems. But there is no way to know with out doing a laproscopy, so if after the next 3 cycles I am not pg, I'll think about it and talk to the nurse about what would be best. Just not sure and crossing fingers we don't have to find out.

I am feeling better, not totally optimistic for this last unmedicated IUI, but good about upping the aggression in treatments. With a limit of 6 IUIs covered by the insurance and this weeks being #2....that is a factor.

We'll see. Wish us luck this weekend.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Onto Another Cycle

Well, we are onto IUI #2. Last month's vacation didn't do the trick and we are planning to IUI this month (should be the first week in October). I am so crossing my fingers that this IUI will work although there is a little dilemma with Andrew's work schedule and maybe being out of town, but he has assured me he will be available when he is needed.

We also are consulting with the RE next Tues (yep on my 31st b-day) about the next step if IUI #2 doesn't work. I am on the fence about if I'd want to do another IUI unmedicated or if we should go ahead and try medicated......I think I may lean towards one more unmedicated and then go the medicated route. Insurance will pay for 6, but there are considerations for IVF as well, so maybe 2 unmedicated and 3 medicated are best.......

But truthfully, I am SO hoping we won't have to do all of that!!!!! We'll see.

I am doing OK this week with the news and looking forward to a get-away with DH this weekend. We need it.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Ramblings on a Friday

Well, not much to report on the baby front, OK nothing to report on the baby front, but I have some time, so I thought I'd write to just get some stuff out. What stuff?? As I sit here, I don't know.

I am trying to numb myself to baby feelings and all the issues I've been having with everyone else having babies and us just observing for what seems like years. We just always had our plan and that has just been shot all to nothing. Now there is no plan.....we thought at this point in our lives we would have a baby and be enjoying that new adventure, but it just hasn't worked out that way.

I have to admit it stresses me a lot now with the idea that if we can somehow manage to get pg this year, Andrew will probably be 37 when the baby arrives..........and who knows if we'll have more, but we aren't spring chickens anymore. I too am sadly getting older and this effects my fertility far more than his age......HECK I'll be 31 in a couple of weeks. My clocks is ticking along and I feel like we are just stuck. Heck we've had this conversation for what seems like years now as family and friends have had babies and grown their families and we have stagnated with the two of us.

I feel like family has basically given up on us having babies and that makes me SAD!!! WE SO WANT A BABY (and I want to scream it from the mountain tops), but things just aren't proceeding as planned. DARN PLANS!!! I so want to tell them of our issues, but then it is always talked about and questioned and I've discovered that is just as hard or harder, so for now we are just going to put on a smiley face and act happy for everyone who is pg and expecting the next bundles of joys (oh, but we are very thrilled for everyone's happy news) much as it makes me want to cry a lot of the time. I have the green envy monster but he is ever present these days in my life and yes, it makes me sad, but I feel like I have no control over him. he just arrives and there he is in the room.

Oh, well. We are off this weekend to support the Hokies, so that will be a nice distraction. our next cycle should begin next week and here's crossing our fingers for some good news to come out of it!!! we've passed the 18 month mark, so surely that means we are due some GOOD, EXCITING, LIFE-CHANGING NEWS!!!!

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

We missed this month.....

So, we were at the beach last week and missed the opportunity to IUI. So IUI #2 will hopefully happen in October. One snafu.....we are supposed to go to SC that weekend and now that is when we will probably need to IUI, so the trip may have to be cancelled....postponed.

I am so ready to be pg and have a baby. As more and more friends are pg and have babies it only gets harder to be in those situations. My friend is due any day now and her pg is the first one I really struggled with and now, with my SIL and her SIL pg and my BF pg all due next spring, I am feeling like this going to be really emotionally hard to handle. Blogging helps me get out a lot of the emotions I am feeling. I am very happy for them all, but I want to feel the same thing. I yearn to join the mommy world as tough and as challenging as that may be.

Someday...and hopefully soon. We'll see.